My Fat Dog
in Giggles on January 22, 2019
Many of you are well-acquainted with my Fat Dog, aka Charley-Girl, aka Captain Destructo. It’s been a hot minute since I wrote about her. For the most part she has been minding her P’s and Q’s. My fatty is now four and a half years old. There was a time, however, when we didn’t think she’d live to see two.
Since one of her kidneys ruptured at 14-months-old, I’ve been a helicopter pet parent. I rush her to the vet every-single-time I think she’s acting weird…only to be told that she’s not sick, she’s only fat.
Morbidly obese, to be correct.
My Golden, who is supposed to top out on the scales at 65 pounds, now weighs NINETY POUNDS. She has been on a diet for two years.
She’s not a fan.
I try to walk her…we make it to the end of the street before she completely falls down, and refuses to get up. Evidently walking is stressing out her joints. I try to swim her.
She passes.
Her idea of swimming, is standing on the first step, backed up to a jet that rubs her tail. That is her daily aquatic workout routine.
She is so round, she waddles when she walks. The vet has called for more dramatic and extreme measures to aid in her weight loss.
Water therapy.
Seriously. She wants me to take Charley to a holistic veterinary hospital, where she can have access to something akin to water aerobics for dogs.
Things that make you go, hmmmmmm.
The alternative plan, is for me to get in my pool and swim laps with her. She will follow me all over the pool, but will not engage in ANY activity (fetch, or otherwise) without me being in the water with her.
Y’all. It’s JANUARY.
Even here in Houston, the weather gets a bit too chilly to swim. For the record, I’m not thrilled about this new exercise regime that I will soon find myself on. Water aerobics. Even as I type this, I’m shaking my head. Damn dog.
Some day soon, I’ll quite literally take the plunge, but for now, on this blustery day, I’ll be content to sit in the middle of my bed (pretending to be creative and productive) while my Fat Dog snores peacefully beside me.
